Why is it that the truth can be so elusive? And not just in the overall quest for truth, but in the gritty day to day of honest folk making an honest living doing regular honest things. Somehow the line is not as clearly defined. Could truth be like math? 2+2=4. Or is truth more like love. An emotion that is much like the wind, never knowing how it truly comes, but when it does we are moved in a certain direction because of it.
Today I wondered...What am I doing wrong? I thought this plus that would equal the certainty. And now, it's as if the rules of the equation have changed on me in my mid-solving mode.
Or maybe truth is like math and the wind. Secure but unpredictable and always interested in surprising the hell out of us.
In either case, I am a bit scattered. Oh, look at me trying to save face. I'm scattered, unsatisfied, dimly hopeful, and somehow loving. I'm confused and frustrated looking at this equation before my eyes. I need a mathematician to come in and help me solve this horrible calculus.
Fickle emotions, how you pull and drag me to a room I don't think I want to stay in. But yet, I somehow got myself here anyhow. Why? What truth was acted upon that got me here. No reason? Bad things happen to good people. Tragic. But truth.
And yet, I still, in my dimly hopeful mood, feel a weak bit of anticipation for redemption. That would be of a math I have not fully studied or received a degree in. But I know the school and degree exists.
And many times, the winds simply come as the trumpet of a storm that is to follow. Yes a storm. In the most beautiful way. Bringing rain that will once again give life and change a landscape. Because a change in the weather is exactly what is needed sometimes.