When You Feel Rude


     We have this restaurant in my hometown that my family and I love going to. But in recent years, they've hired a new hostess. Well, hostess, is a bit of a generous word. This chick couldn't be bothered with you once you enter her premises.

     I honestly have to brace myself every time I order food from this establishment, because I literally feel the urge to wrap my hands firmly around her neck wrists and tell her to just STOP IT.

     But I don't.

     And I calmly smile and pay her for being mean to me.

     One of my life messages that I love preaching about centers around the Kindness of Christ. And how we have the honor in participating and perpetuating this kindness everywhere we go. Even and especially to rude people.

     But it's no cake walk for me either. Rude people get on my nerves too.

     But I've learned to pray to see people not merely with my eyes, but through the eyes of Jesus. And that has made all the difference these last few years.

     I've found that 2 key things seem to make a person rude: 

     1. Tiredness

    2. Disappointment

    But mostly, disappointment.

    When you're tired, physically and emotionally, you simply couldn't be bothered with any one else's emotions, because you're so exhausted and wrapped up in your own. Plus, you're too tired to see that you've offended someone or not paid attention to the details. In our tired state, we tend to overlook things and become careless.

     But when we've been disappointed by life, by family, by dreams, by someone not following through on their word, or showing up on time to work for the next shift when they knew you had plans, we get heated and angry and rude.

     But it's interesting how rudeness becomes viral. Because you then take out your frustrations on unsuspecting civilians that know nothing of your past or your current dilemma/drama. Breeding inward contempt within yourself and among potential friends that you have now made enemies.

     However in these moments, don't let disappointment rule you.

     What is the one thing that can displace disappointment?


     With that said, never ever ever forget that you are loved by God. And secondly, go visit the one person you know that loves and esteems you, so you can be reminded of the good things in life.

     Know that life doesn't end with disappointment, but there is hope and joy to be had and to be lived out, here and now. 

     And embrace Romans 8:28 afresh.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

     Rudeness is an ugly habit that can be broken.

     And it starts with our own hearts.

     I could have put my dear sweet hostess in a headlock and made her apologize, but instead, I softened my own heart by choosing to acknowledge there is something deeper going on with her, and her rudeness is just the outer symptom. She, even in her current state, is worthy of compassion and love.

     And with that, I know that God is faithful to not only meet her heart, but mine as well as I choose to grow in humility and kindness.

     Whereas rudeness tries to exercise false power. Kindness is a true and lasting force.

     Rudeness repels and leaves one isolated and estranged. When in our heart of hearts, all we are wanting and waiting for is for someone to truly care, ask us what's wrong, and hear us out.

     But, Kindness invites and solidifies all those that are connected to it. Creating a vibrant atmosphere of life and love, and leaving the beholder and bestower of such kindness more attractive and more steadfast because of it.

Wisdom's Knocking:

"Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength."

- Eric Hoffer