1. You Can't Remember the Last Time You Had a Proper Date
Or perhaps you refer to a date or a relationship as "Going Steady" of which I'm here to kindly tell you no one uses that phrase anymore, well not since 1987 and only on special occasions.
But really though. When was your last date. When did someone ask to take you out, make plans, pick you up, and Ladies: Where he pays your entire way -- yes, I'm about THAT Life. #unapologetic
When did someone say to you, "I'd love to get to know you better."
Whoa. Did you see that? That was intentionality right there. So let me back up, when was the last time someone was romantically intentional with you and I don't mean just for sexual gratification, I mean, like on that level where they want to know how your mind works and how God made your soul. Yeah, I just went there.
If you can't recall or this has never happened to you, you may have been single too long...
2. Your Parents Stop Asking for Grandchildren
My parents regarded education as a must and a priority while I was growing up. Boys would have to wait. My mom assured me that boys would always be there. I'd have plenty of time for that stuff in college or after college. But until then, "You ain't got time for no boyfriends."
And then college came.
And then college went.
And I could tell that my mom was now starting to get nervous. It was that look of nervousness I had in high school when I thought I'd never ever have a boyfriend. Oh, how the tables turn.
And then my mid-twenties came. And friends were getting married left and right, and babies were popping out everywhere. I mean everywhere. And folks would joke with me about me being next.
And I could see my mom on the sideline, "Please, Lord Jesus."
Fast forward to family gatherings in my late twenties. Still with no boyfriend in sight, the topic itself was the white elephant in the room. And occasionally, in gentle subtle ways, my mom would mention her future grandchildren to me, you know, how she would just like to see them. No big whoop.
But now, I'm 33 and when my mom and I hear of another 23 year old getting married and having a beautiful baby 2 years later, there's simply a deafening silent hush that envelopes the room.
If you have a similar story, you may have been single for too long...
3. While Watching the Romantic Bits of a Disney Cartoon You Find Salty Tears Making Their Way Down Your Cheek.
I've found that I've become way more sensitive while watching the most mild mannered love stories. Whether it be a cartoon or a Hallmark movie, I find myself almost overly connecting to the prospect of romance in a storyline.
Perhaps this is an upside, a blessing in disguise. The little things, like holding someone's hand, being held, a soft kiss, now hold far more weight than they ever have before. They now possess a type of beauty that I honestly never noticed before. And my heart is truly moved. Whereas for others, their hearts may be stoic and desensitized to such small and almost trivial looking actions.
But at the same time, I'm constantly like a teenager, enthralled with the visual of romantic love (And again I'm not talking about sex here, I'm
actually
talking about
storyline
--the journey of getting to love) and it has the potential to become a weird emotional crutch if I'm not careful.
So if you too, find yourself overly emotional while watching rom-coms, Disney cartoons ("
", anyone?!), and every
Movie, you may have been single for too long...
4. You Send Yourself Flowers and Love Notes, and Not Just on Valentine's Day.
I often look in the mirror and tell myself how amazingly beautiful I am or how hot I am. #realtalk
Look, my reasoning, is that
my man
is not currently having the honor of seeing me on a day to day as I bring my A-game. And yes, I do know how to bring A-game in case you were wondering. And as I've said before, I may be single,
but this is not the year of ugliness
. Trust.
But sometimes, I take it further. Often I like to treat myself. And you might find me picking fresh flowers and putting them in the vase next to my bed.
And yes, sometimes, I also write little hearts in my journal or to-do list. And inside those hearts, I'll write something like: "You're Lovely", "Why you so fine?", you know, things like that.
Those are my versions of romantic sentiments to myself.
I don't think I've gone completely off the deep end yet.
Hey, at least I'm not saying that my flowers and notes are from my
invisible boyfriend
Fred. When I start talking about Fred, someone needs to organize an intervention.
So if you tell friends that your brand new pair of shoes or those dozens of roses we saw at your desk are from
Fred (or Ginger)
, you may have been single for too long...
5. If Someone Does One Nice Deed for You, You Are Ready to Make-Out with Them on the Spot.
Look, if you approach me at the right time in life, I might just fall in love with you. These are the times:
- Sunday Morning. If you see me struggling to set up for my youth group and offer to help me carry some equipment in and set up. You can bet that I will be prayerfully considering you for marriage. #couldthisbeyourwillGod
- When I'm Traveling on A Plane. If you help me put my heavy carry-on luggage in that over head bin thingy. AND if you help me take my heavy carry-on luggage down. It's guaranteed that I'll want to give you a hug. And possibly even my number, IF you're single. #dontgetittwisted
- Our First Meeting. If you shake my hand firmly with great eye contact, a warm smile and some smiling eyes, I'm done for. #letthecrushcommence
And with that said, I know my limits. Thankfully, I'm not always like this. Not always...
The kids like to simply call this mindset and its subsequent actions as
Actin' Thirsty
.
So, if you are actin mega thirsty around the opposite sex, chances are you've been single too long...
What are some other ways you know YOU'VE been single too long?? I know I'm not the only one with expertise in this area. Feel free to put your additions in the comments below: