Photo Credit: Lindsay Coleman

     Of course, it's when I don't care that it happens.

     I mean, do you find this happening in your life. You wait for and anticipate some sort of goodness happening, even try to go about pursuing it in someway, only to be smacked upside the head with a piece of brick. Well done.

     But when you are in an aloof state of mind, don't care, barely brush your teeth, and probably didn't put deodorant on, the heavens begin to open and you find yourself having divine encounter after divine encounter and open doors after open doors, everyone is singing your praises and always saying yes, and somewhere in the mix of king invites you to become a queen.

     That was my day to day.

     Most of you know I work in television. I've found this weird niche of sorts that is just enough production and just enough glamor. I don't often talk about my work on this blog because of the high profile people that I'm in contact with and work with. And I don't want to exploit them in some way to merely get a few more readers.

     But my two worlds: The Church & Hollywood become quite surreal at moments.

     If you've been tracking with me, you know that I've been battling a bit of anxiety, fear of death, and overall sadness for the past month or so. Not to mention, I get these weird "Death Feelings" a few days or weeks before someone of prominence or influence (whether in my own life or culturally speaking) dies. This has been happening since I was teenager or so. And yes, it freaks me out. So with the month of December, my grandpa, Paul Walker, Nelson Mandela, and a couple of other prominent people passing away, basically set me on edge in the wackest way.

     I give you all this backstory for you to know that I am not and was not really in the mood to try and impress anyone at work today. I did my best to be hardworking, kind, loving, and patient, but my constant prayer was: "Jesus take the wheel."

     But in the midst of the glitz and the glamor, I could see ever so clearly that this wasn't all that mattered in life. And my tight grasp on my own career path loosened. I wasn't trying to control every outcome by trying to be perfect. I honestly think I was starting to become surrendered. And yes, it was very, very freeing.

     I know that being aloof can be a standoffish quality, but it's only a few degrees from coming to the end of yourself, and becoming truly surrendered.

     Some of you are wondering when "It" is going to happen for you. And the "It" can be many things.

    With that, I'm here to tell you 2 things.

     One. It will most likely happen for you.

     Two. Now forget that it's going to happen to you and live your life fully and sincerely through the ups and downs.

     Because like they always say, it will come when you least expect it.

Wisdom's Knocking:

"Kairos (καιρός) is an ancient Greek word meaning 
the right or opportune moment (the supreme moment)."

Def. Credit: Wikipedia